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Should you consider a prenup? | June 23, 2010

 
Cristen Conger

And I think it’s also worth noting, too, that lawyers advise couples with prenups to review their prenups every few years. Maybe they want to adjust something. Maybe they want to loosen something up or tighten up another part. Why not? It’s a legal binding document, kind of like your will. And it’s worth taking a look it. But also, we often associate, like you said, prenups with just being completely unromantic.

Molly Edmonds

Well, it’s almost saying, "I don’t trust you to be fair to me when we’re getting a divorce."

Cristen Conger

But the thing is, the public perception towards prenups has improved a lot in recent years. And they think it’s due to the recession because have just turned into scrooges and want to make sure that they’re safe. But we found a recent article in USA Today that cited a Harris survey that found that more than one-third of adults – 36 percent to be exact – said prenups make smart financial sense. And that’s up from 28 percent in 2002. But while a third of people have a favorable view of prenups, far fewer actually have them. According to the same Harris survey, only three percent of people with a spouse or finance have a prenup.

But that’s also up form one percent in 2002. But then let’s fast forward to divorce. A lot of people wish that they’d had one, who didn’t. Among people who got a divorce, 15 percent say that they regret not having a prenup in their most recent marriage – according, again, to the Harris poll. And interestingly, men are more likely than women to have this regret. And that’s 19 percent versus 12 percent. And nearly 40 percent of Americans also say they would’ve asked their significant other to sign a prenup if they remarried. So it’s kind of like hindsight is 20/20. It seems like a lot of people have gotten burned by this prenup biz.

Molly Edmonds

Well, and if you are getting remarried and have children, they say that’s an ideal situation for a prenup because you need to make sure that your own children are protected in the case of another divorce. And we actually read one article about blended families and prenuptial agreements. I’ve got to say, Cristen, that might be a topic for a whole nother podcast just because of the finances of a blended family are so tricky. But if you just want to think about it from a prenup perspective, if you’ve got two children, you want to make sure your assets are going to your two children as opposed to someone you may not bitterly hate.

But the thing about bitter hate is, it can happen. And when people say prenups are unromantic, I feel like it’s almost better to think about how you’re going to exit a marriage when you’re most in love, because then you’re more likely to be fair and generous with someone. Whereas, if you are divorcing because of infidelity, you either want to take someone for all they’ve got – or if you’re on the other side, you want to cut them off completely. If you really did love someone, you wouldn’t want that for them. You’d want it to be fair in some way. So again, as Cristen said, I am very pro prenup because, I think far from being unromantic, it’s more romantic to share everything you have in terms of listing it out.

And then also saying, "Well, what’s going to be fair to you and fair to me in the case this airplane crashes."

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