Back when I was a younger pup, I used to be interested in all manner of weird phenomena, ghosts especially, and I figured I would grow up to go study at Duke’s now-defunct school of parapsychology. That didn’t pan out; as I grew further away from the ground, so too did I grow apart from the deep interest I held in the abnormal.

I did manage to pick up a few things along the way, however: Borley Rectory, for example, is probably the most haunted house in the world. One of the coolest photographs ever is of spontaneous combustion victim Dr. John Bentley’s charred leg. And! When the UFOs crashed in Roswell, NM, in 1947, along with aliens in various stages of death and dying, the federales also found a strange, lightweight metal that was tough as diamonds but pliable as paper. It looks like the cloned offspring of the Nazi scientists we poached before they could face the music at Nuremberg after World War II have finally managed to replicate it.