Since I was a kid I’ve been creeped out by beauty pageants. Something about the plasticity of the skin, the set-in-bronze quality of the hair helmets, the tiny subway tile teeth has always sent me screaming in the other direction. The Q&A portion is the worst. That deer-in-the-headlights, drank-the-Kool-Aid smile and an answer seemingly generated by the “P-2000 Responserator.” One-piece bathing suits with pantyhose and high heels has always struck me as one of mankind’s funnier inside jokes. The contestants wear it and the rest of humankind has a good lol. And don’t even ask me about the kid pageants. Having said that, pardon me for thinking the following was really funny…

The New York Times reports that reigning Miss Universe Dayana Mendoza of Venezuela paid a PR visit to the troops at the U.S. Naval Base at Guantanamo Bay, Cuba. She then blogged about it, which in retrospect may have been a bad idea. Some of the highlights:

• “the first thing we did was attend a big lunch and then we visited one of the bars they have in the base.”
• In reference to a boating excursion – “we took a ride around the land and it was a loooot of fun!”
• On detainees – “we saw the jails, where they shower, how the (sic) recreate themselves with movies, classes of art, books.”
• “The water in Guantánamo Bay is soooo beautiful!”
• And finally – “I didn’t want to leave, it was such a relaxing place, so calm and beautiful.”

So that happened. In her defense, it was a U.S.O. tour and she was there trying to do a good thing. And while it sounded like she took in a day at Legoland, I doubt she meant to be insensitive.

In case you’re wondering, the blog post was promptly removed.

Read up if you don’t want to end up like her:
10 Notable Beauty Pageant Moments
6 Unusual Beauty Pageants
Health and Beauty: 10 Questions for Dr. Oz